I wanted to share something that smacked me upside the head when I was reading this book.
I’m on the other side of Desperate in my life now…my youngest is 11 and 4 of my children are now adults. I’m in a very different place. Yes, I can vividly remember those sleepless nights when I had to tie a baby to me with my bathrobe for fear of dropping her while I tried to burp her, I was so tired. I remember not speaking to an adult for days – my husband was in grad school and he’d come home between 1-2 am and leave to get back to school by 7 am. I remember having to take 5, 6, 7 children everywhere I went. I had no family nearby. We lived in a college town and there were very few married couples in my church and no truly older woman.
But I come from a time and family that just DEALT with hard situations. You didn’t ask for help, you just did what you had to do. Today we say we “sucked it up.”
I was reading page 20 of Desperate (I’ll let you run and get your copy to follow along…) and felt a THUD in my chest and then the tears started to trickle and then BURST forth! I’m not a sobber, but I was sobbing!
Sally was telling of visiting a friend and how her friend had prepared a tray with a lit candle, pot of tea, muffins and vase with flowers, and a note that said she was praying for her and other sweet encouragement. She wrote the following that absolutely echoed my heart:
Unexpectedly, the tears began flowing down my face. I was so used to toughing it out and taking care of all of our family’s needs and losing sleep and caring for the kids alone that I didn’t even know how much I needed a real live friend who could communicate to me that I was not invisible, and show me thoughtfulness that comes from a heart moved by the Spirit of God. Even just the thought that someone else had been considerate of me and prepared my breakfast touched a very deep vulnerable place in my heart that I had not even recognized as a need.
My breath catches in my chest even now as I type this.
I have never had this. Please know I LOVE MY LIFE. I have no regrets or latent frustrations or hostility. I do not begrudge the years of service and ministry to my husband or the mentoring I’ve done (and still do) to young mothers. I’ve had a couple of times of young friends taking me out for a “kidnapping” date. Even the year when I had an older mentor in North Dakota – she taught me, she corrected me, she trained me. But it wasn’t a time where I was completely pampered and prayed over and had my needs met.
This was all just one more confirmation to me that the heart and passion God placed on my heart 33 years ago (back when my hair fell out) of His plan for older women to come alongside the younger women and gently lead them (train and correct too) and be a HELP was EXACTLY RIGHT!
If you are an older woman, are YOU pouring your life into a young mom?Are YOU thinking about the needs you had to be mothered? Are YOU coming alongside and giving her help in her times of feeling Desperate?
If not…I think it’s time you did!
Blogs I might be linking to:
Menu Planning Monday, On The Menu Monday, Erin Branscoms, Marital Oneness, The Better Mom, Multitudes on Monday, Hear it On Sunday, Sharing His Bounty, What Joy Is Mine, Playdates at the Well, Back to School Monday, Domestically Divine Tuesdays, Time Warp Wife, Funky Planet Frequent Flier Club, Encourage One Another, Living Well Wednesdays, The Welcoming House, Legacy Leaver Thursday, What’s Up Wednesday, Thought Provoking Thursday, Hearts 4 Home, Thankful Thursday, First Day of My Life , Thankful Thursdays, Thankful, Thankful Thursday Brown-eyed Bell(e), Big Family Fridays, Faith Filled Fridays, Feasting In Fellowship Friday, Homemaking Link-up Week-end, A Little R&R