Submission: wimpy or hefty?

How many times have you heard that only wimps are submissive? The world has such a distorted view of submission:

  • doormat
  • mindless
  • weak
  • follower
  • gutless

They are confusing COMPLAISANT and SUBMISSIVE.

submission: wimpy or hefty


The world does not understand that it takes great strength to be a submissive wife! You submit out of CHOICE not because you are told to. A submissive wife is not a doormat, nor is she mindless or weak. You surrender to the will of God, even if you have better ideas or thoughts than your husband. You willingly put your husband’s desires as more important than your own. This takes courage, faith and trust in God, fortitude and conviction that this is the BEST and that God will work through your submission for His glory.

Being complaisant means: inclined or disposed to please; obliging; agreeable. This is the person who wants to make everyone happy. They take the easiest route in any situation. They don’t actually make real choices, they flow with the way that pleases others.

The complaisant person is a people-pleaser. The submissive person is a God-pleaser!

Don’t wanna be a manpleaser – I wanna be a Godpleaser
I just want to have the wisdom to discern the two apart
Don’t wanna be a manpleaser – I wanna be a Godpleaser
I just want to do the things that please the Father’s heart
(Petra “God Pleaser” from the Not Of This World album 1983

Let us become strong women of faith, women who CHOOSE to walk in surrender to God, and by His strength and power, in submission to our husbands. Not man-pleasers who change according to who we are with, but solid women of trust and faithfulness who can handle the challenges that come our way.

(image courtesy of J. Howard Miller, artist employed by Westinghouse,[Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons)

Linking to:
Marital Oneness, Encourage One Another, Wifey Wednesday, Winsome Wednesday, Women Living Well Wednesdays, Hearts 4 Home, Big Family Fridays

Print Friendly


  1. Terri
    May 2, 2012    

    This was great. Submission is something I have always looked at as a choice. Wimps don’t make choices, choices are made for them. People who have control and are free in it make conscious decisions to submit to the authority that God has placed in their lives. For me I’ve looked at submission as a way of showing honor to someone and respect. Its not a passive response but an active response.

    Found your blog on incourage!

    • Kate
      May 2, 2012    

      Terri, you are so right. Submission is something we do out of faith, not out of fear. Thanks for stopping by. I’ll check out your blog too!

  2. Desiray
    May 2, 2012    

    You know sis many people like you said have no idea what submission really means. WHen people get married most woman don’t submit to their husbands and if they only knew that submitting to their husband is really their head covering they would do it JOY.

    People have hard time submitting to authority that God has placed in the Land had He not put authority here people would run a mock and do as they please there must be law and order.

    Maybe one day sis people will wake up and see that we have to submit,

    • Kate
      May 2, 2012    

      Desiray, you are so right: submission is both our protection AND a joy! When done by the power of the Spirit, it brings life to us. The world just simply cannot understand that! Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this, dear sister.

  3. May 2, 2012    

    I can never understand why women look at submission as negative. My husband is such a blessing, cherishing me, leading our lives, eager for my opinion. He’s not a tyrant shoving his weight around. He leads like God leads him. Love the song!

    • Kate
      May 2, 2012    

      I think that many women reject submission partly because of the curse and partly because they just don’t believe that putting someone’s needs as more important than our own can EVER lead to our happiness. But they are not understanding the entirety of the Christian faith! It is ALL about sacrificing our lives for the benefit of others.

      I’m so glad for your marriage, that you have a godly loving husband. It is a great testimony to how God intended marriage to be! Thanks for sharing, Pamela!

  4. May 2, 2012    

    Thanks for differentiating the two. So many women get this confused, and unfortunately, too many husbands do too and thus take advantage of his wife’s submissiveness.

    New follower from (in)courage.


    • Kate
      May 2, 2012    

      Thanks, Marcia, for your thoughts and for the follow. The more we center our hearts and minds in the heart and mind of God, the more we understand and JOYFULLY submit to His plan for our marriages!

  5. May 2, 2012    

    You are so right! It does take a lot of strength to submit! Today was one of those days!

    • Kate
      May 2, 2012    

      Esther Joy, I know what those days are like! Praying blessings and peace flood over you in abundance tonight!

  6. May 3, 2012    

    Hi Kate – such a great post and I agree, it does take great strength to be a submissive wife. Its far easier to well… not be. God bless

    • Kate
      May 3, 2012    

      Thanks, Tracy! I appreciate your thoughts and the visit!

  7. May 3, 2012    

    SO TRUE!!! We were just studying this on Tuesday at our Woman’s Bible study- Jo Andersen’s “Doormat to Dignity” lesson in Renewing Love– true submission does not mean being a doormat. True submission takes alot of courage and strength. It is so much easier to give into our flesh than to say…no I choose to do what is right!

    • Kate
      May 3, 2012    

      I have not heard of that study, but it sounds really good! Flesh or faith…that is our constant choice, isn’t it! Thanks for coming by, Connie!

  8. May 3, 2012    

    I love this Kate! So many people (mostly my family) think I do whatever my husband wants me to do and that he is in control of me. That is not the case! They just don’t understand what it means to be submissive. They don’t understand how I could possibly be happy submitting to my husband! But, I am!

  9. May 4, 2012    

    People who talk about submission in a bad light simply don’t understand it. I completely agree with you, submission can be beautiful! Thank you for linking up with me today!

  10. May 4, 2012    

    Submission is a word that I never used to want to hear and now understand that it really is necessary for the best possible marriage.

    • Kate
      May 4, 2012    

      Hi Sharla…it’s amazing what God can do in our lives, isn’t it? I was like you – submission was NOT for me! Then the Lord got a hold of my heart (He ripped my hair out to get to it) and completely transformed my understanding! Praising Him for it every day!!

  11. November 5, 2015    

    Desconozco que tipo de dispositivo Android os estás usando.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

4 Total Shares